Lately I’ve been a little creativity blocked, as an art teacher, some might find that mildly hilarious.
“I like quiet. Like…really like it. I like hearing my heartbeat in my neck and head, feeling it pulse in my chest. I like the sound of my breathing in, and out, in, and out.. I like finding new sounds in whatever room I happen to be sitting in at the moment – the sound of an air conditioner kicking on, the pitter-patter of a child’s steps down the hall outside my classroom… birds singing songs on the wire in my backyard… the postal truck driving by, the mellow squeak of tires braking, and mail dropping into the box… distant conversations over fences just far enough away to blur the topic from eavesdropping ears… the cry of the teapot, the sizzle of breakfast, the hum of my computer…”- Journal entry from October 5, 2018.
But there are also times that I really detest having to be quiet. When every sound I pick up frustrates my rushed-feeling soul…it’s like with every sound I’m reminded of the seconds ticking through the hours in my day and there. just. isn’t. enough. time. in. my. day. to get all the things done.
I started this journal entry in the middle of the task of trying to find some extra money in our budget to start a savings account. I tired of that pretty quickly and was just feeling restless and realized my desire to type out my thoughts. My mind immediately went to the quiet that is overwhelming my classroom at the moment. These moments are rare; once kiddos walk across the threshold into the art room, there is no more quiet. But it’s joyful noisemaking – the sink filling up water pails, drawers opening and closing to find just the right art supply, drying rack levels going up and down…filling with art, small chatter discussing the right color to use and where, story-telling at its finest. This is the sound of creating.
It brings my soul much joy to sit and watch a child create. I give them a problem and tell them to solve it. Sometimes I give parameters, but most of the time they are free to solve the problem given in any way they deem appropriate. This is pretty much the most vulnerable a person can be. In creating something, you are opening up a piece of your soul that, until now, only you have seen. You are daring to be brave enough the let the world around you see that piece of your soul. Once it is out, it is open to criticism, judgment, and… Oh, that the world would be constructive with its criticisms.”
Fast forward two year with me. We are sitting in 2020 and we’re all thinking, ”Can this year just hurry up already?” I still have the same rushed feeling in my soul, even more so in this current socioeconomic climate. As a creative being - and I believe we all are in some capacity - this begs the question: why do we have such difficulty creating sometimes? Possible criticisms aside, there are so many other reasons why we feel that we can’t create. I think the main one is that we just don’t find the time to create.
Do we have time? Of course. We make time for the things we deem important. Yet somehow, our lives still feel rushed. Not just our physical lives, but our mental and emotional lives as well. We are always thinking about the next thing on our schedule. Or maybe it’s because we are afraid to be vulnerable in our creativity. If you’re anything like me, you might think up an idea and then quickly toss it out for fear that it’s too simple or irrelevant or even overdone. I think that it would help us more if we could live in the present moments we are given, even if they are heart-wrenching or dull, hurried or slow, life-giving or exasperating. Creativity does not come from nothing. I’m a firm believer that there are no original creative ideas. All of our ideas are shaped from experiences we’ve had or creativity we’ve seen from others. We capture the essence of that creativity and make it our own; we take the experiences we’ve had and shape them in some way to let others see and feel them in the same way we did, either through words written, strokes of a paintbrush, or melodies written on the nearest piece of scrap paper. There is no wrong answer when it comes to being truly creative.
I need creativity. We all need it. And in order to be truly creative, we need each other. Creativity flourishes in community, so let community in.
Here’s how I have found it easy to find inspiration in my work.
See what others around you are creating and join them. Maybe that’s finding a new visual artist to follow on social media and trying to mimic their style until it molds into something that’s just yours.
Gather some fellow creatives around you and create a challenge that you can all participate in - bringing each one’s individual ideas to the table.
Carry a small sketchbook or a notebook with you everywhere and just write down ideas as they come- a sentence or two. As a visual artist, just writing down my ideas is super helpful, because sketching it out is sometimes harder and more time consuming.
Above all else, find time to sit in the quiet. I still love just sitting and finding new sounds in the quiet around me. As I relax and let my breath catch up with my mind, I find my slower pace starting to embrace snippets of creative thoughts I’ve had throughout the day, and I can then begin to build them into full creative ideas. Does that mean I always have creative thoughts throughout the day? Nope. Sometimes just sitting in the quiet rejuvenates me, and that’s enough for the day. It’s like a giant reset button on my brain! Relieve yourself of the pressure to be perfect in your creativity (because, HA, NO ONE is perfect!), and just create! Your heart will grow in confidence in your ability and you will overflow with thankfulness that you’ve given yourself time to just think.